Reviews For Metamorphosis
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Reviewer: LolliBear06 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 17, 2010 1:16 am
Chapter number: 59
Title: A New Kind of Adventure, Part 2

Thank you thank you thank you for doing your research on pregnancy.  So many authors (mainly on ffn) don't do any and you're like "Sorry, babies don't kick at two months."  I wanna say that I love your story, and I have seen a couple with the same basic plot and this is one of the best.  I like how Kagome became a hanyou and how she and Inuyasha didn't instantly fall into each other's arms because they had so much in common.

Author's Response:

I couldn't imagine writing about something I know little about without doing research.  I guess that's the academic in me. 

I've seen a few other Kagome-becomes-hanyou stories as well, but didn't like any of them.  One of my original goals was definitely to do the romance differently than those stories handled it. 





Reviewer: littlekitsune1 Signed [Report This]
Date: October 01, 2010 3:17 am
Chapter number: 58
Title: A New Kind of Adventure, Part 1

Hee hee, good luck with that wish, Inu. It's the boys who more commonly resemble their mom, and vice-versa. XD Hmm, bringing up the ears was a good point... Now I have some weird vision of what a cat-dog baby would look like... One cat ear, one dog ear? Or maybe it'll be a perfect balance and just look very fox-like.

I wonder if they'll be able to find a hanyou doctor... I guess if they can't, a youkai one would be the next best thing, huh? Knowing both sides of the coin and all.

Author's Response: I don't know about you, but I can't tell cat vs. dog ears apart.  I don't know if they can either, but that didn't stop Inu from making a competition out of it.  :) 





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: September 30, 2010 11:29 pm
Chapter number: 58
Title: A New Kind of Adventure, Part 1

Great work on this chapter even though I do think my own wife would have killed me if I heard the hartbeat before she did. 

As a small think may I recomend her mom buy one of the baby hart monitor things for Kagome so that maby she can hear the heart beat.  (Yes my wife had one also)

 

As a side thing I have seen one thing in some fanfiction that also helps say why he does not follow the repect your elders good.  As per the 3rd movie (if you count it) he was 150 before he was sealed making him older then even the old humans in the show.



Author's Response:

That's true about him not respecting elders because he's older than they are.  Remember that he's only fifty (not including sealed years) in this story. 

The women get to feel the baby first, so what's the big deal if the man gets to hear it first, right?  Interesting idea about the heart monitor, but Kagome has sharp hearing too, so I'm sure she'll hear it soon.  If she were human, then I probably would to something like that.  But she's hanyou, so I don't think it's necessary. 





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: September 13, 2010 4:43 pm
Chapter number: 57
Title: The Meddlesome Matchmaker

Great chapter here.  I think it also shows alot how Kagome want to help and change things for the better even if it is diffrent then most people thing should be done.





Reviewer: la623 Signed [Report This]
Date: September 03, 2010 9:18 pm
Chapter number: 56
Title: Our Future

I LOVED THIS! So sweet! :)

Author's Response:

I'm glad, thanks.  :)





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: September 02, 2010 10:44 pm
Chapter number: 56
Title: Our Future

Very nice.  I like hoiw they are going off feeling and not thier brains.  You are never "ready" for kids as you never will have verything just right.  Nice work on this chapter maing it more abhout it feeling right then knowing if it is or not.

Author's Response:

That's a very good point, that you are never "ready" for kids.  I'm a firm believer that sometimes you just have to push logic to the side and do what you know or feel is right, especially if you have supernatural powers and senses like two seem to have. 

To quote a famous movie, "Never tell me the odds."  :-)





Reviewer: littlekitsune1 Signed [Report This]
Date: September 02, 2010 9:57 pm
Chapter number: 56
Title: Our Future

Sorry to double post, but I felt like I could explain some of my feelings clearer. By "too soon" I meant after losing their first baby. I've gone through countless grief and loss stages in my life, and even with dramatic events and loved ones escalating my recovery (like Inuyasha and Kagome have had) it always takes much longer than they've had for me to get over it enough that I can move on. So this is speaking from my own life experience, which I obviously can't claim everyone goes through the same, as a reader that's how it felt to me. Even if they're 100% commited to each other, I felt it would take more time to be able to take that final step again.

I also understand that they weren't thinking on logic. However, I'm the type of person who feels that if the logic of a situation is the only course of action that will result in a good ending, you tamp down the emotion. So it bothered me personally, because it wasn't even a choice in my opinion. Our emotions very often lead us astray. As another extreme example, it could "feel right" to sleep with someone else while you're in a relationship, but that doesn't mean you do it. Your emotions are likely influenced by something else and you need to take the logical path. But in any case, that is of course my opinion. It just seems like they're risking a little life needlessly.

As for stronger enemies, I don't think they can rule out the fact that there aren't. If one that has their strength or close to it gets hold of a shard, they're in major trouble. Again, it just feels like they're risking a new baby's life needlessly when they could just wait until the quest is over.

I do trust you to have this all planned out, of course. But I know that if my readers were unhappy with something, I'd want to know, and why. =) This is the first thing/chapter of yours I haven't been satisfied with, so it is no way meant to be an insult against you.



Author's Response:

I know it isn't, and I do appreciate the feedback.  If all the reviews were positive then I'd either have written the perfect story (which I know isn't the case) or I'd know some people were hiding their true thoughts.  And I don't want that, as long as the criticism is constructive. 

I believe it's been 3-5 months since they lost the first baby; I don't keep strict track of time.  It's difficult to relate them to any contemporary person because their situation is unique.  I can't speak for you, but maybe they'd get over it faster because they're young?  At such a young age, they are really in love with someone, and how many of us can say that?  The readers' life experiences is something I can't control; all I can do is write what makes sense to me in the context of the Inuyasha storyline.  And I wouldn't say they're "over it" completely, but they're over it enough to move on with their lives. 

If you know that logic is the only way you get a good ending, then of course you tamp down the emotion.  But that's not the case here.  Yes, it's a risk, but so is getting pregnant when the mission is over.  Getting pregnant at all is a risk!  Granted, it's a smaller risk, but there are no guarantees in life, either good or bad.  To put it another way, they made a calculated gamble, taking slightly worse odds for the chance to have a child sooner.  That's a very dry way of putting it, but I think it's a valid analogy. 

Your cheating example misconstrues the phrase "feel right" as I used it.  That seems to indicate it felt physically right, or seemed like a good idea at the time.  It doesn't indicate a deep personal truth, as I used it.  Maybe you do sleep with someone else if the relationship you're in is going downhill fast.  Maybe a personal revelation tells you that the person you're dating isn't the one you were destined to be with.  How often does something like this happen in movies?  I find it hard to believe it doesn't happen in real life.  And as I said before, this type of "feeling right" doesn't just depend on emotion.  It's far deeper than that, at the level of the soul or even Kagome's miko powers. 

They can't rule out the possibility of stronger enemies, but they can assume that there are very few youkai out there that would give them a hard time under normal circumstances.  It may not seem that way in this story, but that's because I only write about the parts with tough youkai or situations.  The standard find a youkai and kill it scenario is pretty boring.  So it doesn't happen all that often, only a handful or two of times since the beginning of the story.  All that's just part of the risk I outlined earlier.  In fact, that's the entire substance of the risk. 

Again, I don't mind the criticism.  It always causes me to rethink myself, and sometimes I go back and change things around.  But this element of the story is too important to the plot, and if you're the only one who has a problem with it, then I won't make any changes.  It would be impossible for me to retract myself at this point anyway!  I hope you can at least see my point of view and can look past this and continue to read the story. 





Reviewer: littlekitsune1 Signed [Report This]
Date: September 02, 2010 5:56 am
Chapter number: 56
Title: Our Future

*posts here as well*

Huuuu... I really didn't like this chapter at all. Their logic isn't good enough for me, and it's just dumb on so many levels, including the fact that I feel like it's too soon in their relationship.

I mean... it doesn't matter if they're wiser or stronger. Shit can still happen that's beyond their control, and there ARE enemies stronger than them out there. Throw in the powers of the shards... It just doesn't make any sense whatsoever why they would make such a decision. If they're so sure of their strength, they should use it to wait until it's just logically safer. Making the entire "They were stronger than before, both as individuals and as a couple, and wiser as well." obsolete to me, cuz I'm shouting "OBVIOUSLY NOT!" at the screen. If I wanted something in my life that bad, I wouldn't put it in such obvious danger.



Author's Response:

I expected some people would be skeptical about the latest chapter, which is why I spent 3,000 words writing about a very brief segment of time. So far you're the only who's said anything to that effect (here or at mm.org). I respect your opinion, but I think you're missing the whole point of the chapter.

You said "Their logic isn't good enough for me..." That's just it; it wasn't logic that led them to their decision. Personally, I believe that a couple times in our lives, we can feel something so strongly, with such conviction, that we can make logically unwise decisions. Granted, it hasn't happened to me yet, but I believe it will someday. Take romance, for example. Are there times where everything that makes sense is telling you to ditch your lover and move on, yet your heart is telling you to stay? Like a personal epiphany, you just *know* that something is the right thing to do. Kagome did think that this "felt right." We can't live our lives only doing what makes sense logically, when our hearts are crying out to do something else.

You said "it's too soon in their relationship." I don't think so. Recovering from tragedy, heartbreak, and a very rough spot in their relationship cannot help but make it stronger. They are now married, fully comitted where they weren't before. There's really not much more growth they can undergo as a couple until they become parents.

You said "shit can still happen that's beyond their control, and there ARE enemies stronger than them out there." True, shit can still happen. But are you sure there are stronger enemies out there? I think you're underestimating just how powerful they've become. Naraku was notionally stronger, but they defeated him, so what does that say? Are there more youkai out there who are as powerful as Naraku? Sesshoumaru? Maybe, but he's not after the shards. And even if he was, at this point in the story Inuyasha and Tetsusaiga are at least a match for him. The giant beetle before blindsided them. They were reckless and didn't realize the danger until it was too late. They would have fought differently given the wisdom they now possess.

Your second paragraph continues to analyze the decision logically when it's not really about logic. The logic I did employ, about them being stronger than they were before, is completely true. Again, going through everything they did couldn't fail to make them stronger, both physically and mentally, and wiser. The best life lessons are learned through times of hardship, when life challenges us. If you're shouting "obviously not," it's because you are confusing strength and wisdom with logic (again). They have chosen to follow their heats instead of pure logic this time, but that doesn't mean they aren't wiser.

You said "If I wanted something in my life that bad, I wouldn't put it in such obvious danger." I certainly can't speak for you, but in terms of Inuyasha and Kagome, it wasn't just about wanting a child either, though that certainly played a role. Deep down, they both felt it as the right thing to do, and the right time to do it. It's very complicated, but I designed it that way. You have logic mixing with desire mixing with something else, something mysterious. Related to Kagome's powers, or their souls, or even the Kami (the whole child of destiny possibility). I didn't specify, because it's as mysterious to me as it is to you. But I believe that human life is deeper than logic, or desire. I believe there are things that help us run our lives, make our decisions, that we can't explain. And that's in today's world, not the highly-"magical" time of the Feudal Era. And if you don't believe in those things, if you only see the logic and nothing else, then I fear you will never like this chapter.





Reviewer: Thayet Signed [Report This]
Date: September 02, 2010 3:52 am
Chapter number: 56
Title: Our Future

Awesome chapter, I loved how in tune they are to each other's moods, thoughts, and feelings on practically everything. The silent communication between them in this story is even more pronounced than normal and wonderful to see. It also shows just how much they really have grown both individually and as a couple as well as how much their trust in each other and themselves has matured and grown. Another great chapter and I can't wait for the next one.

Author's Response: Thank you.  They surprised themselves with how in tune they were to each other, which I think says a lot about how far their relationship has come.  I agree with you 100%.  Next chapter should be much easier to write than this one, so I hope to have a much longer chapter coming out within the next two weeks.  Cheers. 





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 22, 2010 4:08 pm
Chapter number: 55
Title: The Meaning of Sorrow

Nice chapter with the village.  One thing you may want to play with is some of the things they are doing now affecting the future.  What I mean is something like this village or thier home villiage being found in a history book or something as foundation of change where demons and humans can live togther.

Author's Response: Oh, I'm not touching that with a ten foot pole.  It has the potential to get really complicated really quickly.  My outline for the rest of the story is basically complete, and I'm not looking to add anything else.  Thanks for the suggestion, though. 





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: August 16, 2010 1:33 pm
Chapter number: 54
Title: Renewed Quest

Very good work on this chapter.  I look foward to seeing how thier night as Human man and wife goes evne though I do not think you will make it a good lemon filled night for the 2.

 One think I never could understand is why did he never get a dagger or something for his human night as a back up wepon that could be used?



Author's Response: Hmm, that's a good question.  Maybe it's because he thought that admitting that he needed a weapon would show weakness? 





Reviewer: la623 Signed [Report This]
Date: August 02, 2010 4:57 am
Chapter number: 53
Title: The Bonds Humans Make

I Loved this! and that moment with Inuyasha and Kagome's mom had me in tears! Can't wait to read more! :)





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 31, 2010 3:25 am
Chapter number: 53
Title: The Bonds Humans Make

Great chapter.  And the reson mend do not have to hide the horns is women know us men and evil pigs but we men thing our wifes are perfect lol.





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 07, 2010 9:25 pm
Chapter number: 52
Title: A Birthday to Remember

Great chapter and I am glad you could use the idea so well.  I did crack up about him palming the mouse as I think most people would keep something that could trun his wife into a "Wild Cat" and I think most wifes would as well.

 

I loved the gift also as I so think would cherish it.  Just think how cool it would be to have a big diamon with the picture in it like that.



Author's Response:

That would be cool!  Though I think I would be tempted to sell the diamond... 

I completely agree about the "Wild Cat" thing, for both men and women. 





Reviewer: Thayet Signed [Report This]
Date: July 06, 2010 4:52 pm
Chapter number: 52
Title: A Birthday to Remember

Great chapter, the catnip piece had me giggling. I love that Mrs. H made Yash wait to propose untill a more appropriate time, it was a little sad that she didn't believe it was what he wanted though. Yash's present was a beautiful idea and definately something that Kags will appreicate forever. Gramps bit with the hair piece was awesome. Great work, I can't wait for the next chapter.

Author's Response:

Kagome's POV goes back to Inuyasha's history with Kikyou.  He was going to marry her only if he became a human, and Kagome thought that would make him not want to get married, like leaving a bad taste in his mouth.  All things considered, it was relatively easy for him to convince her otherwise once he knew what the problem was. 

I'm glad you liked Inuyasha's present; I agree that she will appreciate it for a long time, whether or not the well ends up getting sealed.  Gramps' present was thought up at the last minute, but I was happy with it.  It was something for the modern era, but also something that shows his acceptance of Kagome staying a hanyou. 





Reviewer: Selina MacCloveror Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: July 04, 2010 4:50 am
Chapter number: 52
Title: A Birthday to Remember

Very nice, and I did notice you cut back on the wordiness.  (That's something I'm currently working on, too, and it's not easy!)  I was totally wrong on the birthday present, by the way; I don't think I ever would have thought of that!

The catnip joke was cute, and the side effects were funny.  Those two just make me want to pinch their cheeks sometimes, LOL.

I was about to be SOOOO mad at you about the proposal.  But I'm glad they worked it out and you didn't save it for the next chapter, because >.> that would have been grounds for hair-pulling.  

Great chapter!  :D



Author's Response:

Oh, come now, would I do that?  *blinks innocently*

Ok, so maybe I would do it, but I didn't even consider leaving a cliffie this time.  I didn't think this marriage argument was something that could burst into a full-on angst-fest.  This time, it really was just a misunderstanding.  And I hope it was your hair you were intent on pulling.  :)

Actually, it was pretty easy for me to cut back on my wordiness.  My academic writing style is naturally concise, so I guess I was channelling that part of me.  That's why I was worried about it.  Was I being too short?  I didn't think so, but I didn't want the chapter to seem choppy either.  The upcoming chapters should be more of the same, with only the really important parts given great detail.  What is it about seeing the finish line that makes you want to run faster? 





Reviewer: la623 Signed [Report This]
Date: July 04, 2010 4:15 am
Chapter number: 52
Title: A Birthday to Remember

LOL...that part with the catnip was hilarious...This was so sweet. I swear, Kagome can be so dumb sometimes! lol...I loved this...can't wait to read more

Author's Response: Haha, maybe we should just say hanyou can be so dumb sometimes.  Or...everyone can be dumb sometimes. 





Reviewer: Selina MacCloveror Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 21, 2010 12:08 am
Chapter number: 51
Title: Tying Up Loose Ends

I'm eager to see what InuYasha's birthday gift to Kagome might be.  I'll admit I haven't a clue, but I'm sure it will be awesome given all the thought he's put into it (and the nods of approval from two credible sources).  The marriage proposal ought to be interesting as well.  I can only imagine InuYasha getting through something like that without a few well-placed blushes. 

Kagome dropping out of school was a bit of a surprise, but the arguments make sense, especially if she really is having just too hard of a time keeping up.  And equations have practical use in real life, mister - just so you know.  I use basic algebra pretty often, and that's NOT just in my career.  ;)

Aaaand it looks like my prediction was spot-on.  Making up for lost time is definitely a good thing.  The baseball analogy was delightfully corny, and it made me laugh.  

Great chapter - I laughed, I cried, I got a little hot 'n' bothered...well, I didn't really cry, but I needed something else to throw in there.  Can't wait to see the festivities go down.  ^_^



Author's Response:

Hehe, I was wondering what there was in this chapter to cry about.  But you're right; two things a list does not make! 

A little corniness here and there is amusing, right?  I debated with myself for awhile then said 'eh, what the hell.'  I can't believe I haven't seen more stories where Kagome drops out.  Here in the States, dropping out of school isn't so much a question of family honor as it is limiting your job and income opportunities.  Do Japanese families really put that much importance into graduating high school?  *shrugs* 

I'm loving the fact that I have next chapter mostly planned out already.  But I'm going on vacation for a week, so it might take a little longer than this one did.  Not too long, I hope.  It's exciting to be heading toward the end of this monster that I love so much! 





Reviewer: Selina MacCloveror Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 20, 2010 1:25 am
Chapter number: 50
Title: Completion

Well, this chapter was pretty exciting.  Kenji's character is interesting, and I'm excited to see the role he's going to play.  It's going to be vital, I'm sure, and a believable, essential OC is always nice for a change-up. 

And holy lemon!  That was a nice one.  Obviously, it's so nice to see them back where they need to be in just about every way now.  Something tells me the freaky-deaky will make a very strong come-back in their lives now, especially after so long going without it.  ;)

And ooh, we meet a new villain.  *rubs hands together*  And he sounds delicious!  I can't wait to see what you have in store for him.  

Congratulations on hitting your 50-chapter mark.  :D



Author's Response:

Thanks.  Over 300,000 words now too.  Whew! 

It had to be a nice lemon after all the angst.  You may be on to something there with your prediction, hehe.  And you don't have to wait long to find out; chapter 51 was posted yesterday.  I like to throw in the OCs every now and then.  It makes 51 chapters of the same story a lot more interesting. 





Reviewer: la623 Signed [Report This]
Date: June 20, 2010 1:07 am
Chapter number: 51
Title: Tying Up Loose Ends

yay...this was sweet...Loved this...can't wait to read more!





Reviewer: Thayet Signed [Report This]
Date: June 19, 2010 9:02 pm
Chapter number: 51
Title: Tying Up Loose Ends

Another great chapter, the baseball bit after they went upstairs made me laugh. I also have a vauge idea of what Yash's gift is going to be and I can't wait to find out for sure. Keep up the great work and I can't wait for the next chapter.

Author's Response:

The baseball - sex analogy is a classic that's hard to mess up.  You'll have to let me know if your idea about Inuayasha's gift is correct. 





Reviewer: Deathmvp Signedstarstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 18, 2010 4:58 pm
Chapter number: 51
Title: Tying Up Loose Ends

Great chapter.  May I recomend in the next chapter that Miroku talkes to his wife and she say something like they are already married.  This way they can be married in the present with Kagomes famly and both times would see them as married.

Very nice chapter here by the way. 



Author's Response: Eh, that's already pretty clear, isn't it?  Some things I spell out explicitly, but I don't think this needs to be one of those. 





Reviewer: topper05 Signedstarstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 18, 2010 2:35 am
Chapter number: 51
Title: Tying Up Loose Ends

Not the longest of chapters but it was a very good one.





Reviewer: topper05 Signedstarstarstar [Report This]
Date: June 17, 2010 11:57 pm
Chapter number: 50
Title: Completion

I hope this wasn't the end to your story.





Reviewer: lovemehateme Signed [Report This]
Date: June 13, 2010 12:24 am
Chapter number: 25
Title: Frustration, Part 2

docket?



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